Remember that you are not alone in this situation. The two of you can get through this together. She needs you now more than ever, but it is important that you provide her with the support she needs both emotionally and physically. Here are some tips on how you do this.
What to do:
Talk with her and listen to her. Keep the lines of communication open between the two of you at all times. DO NOT close yourself off emotionally because this situation involves more than just you!
Stay calm. She needs your support now more than ever. She may be carrying the baby, but you are BOTH parents, and regardless of your relationship in the future, that baby needs you too.
Talk with people who care about you. In addition to keeping the lines of communication open between the two of you, it’s important to discuss the situation with parents and others who’ll be directly affected. Hiding the news from people who can genuinely help you only increases the stress.
Gather all the facts. Get all the information and seek wise advice so you can make the best decision for each of you.
Express yourself honestly. It’s normal to have feelings of anger, frustration, and fear. But make sure she knows she’s not alone. Be honest with yourself and with her. You’ll be surprised at how much it will help her to know that you share the same concerns. You’ll be surprised at what you learn about yourself. And you’ll be proud that you’re standing tall together.
What Not To Do:
Don’t run from your responsibilities. The more you run from this, the harder it becomes to think and act clearly.
Don’t pressure her to do what you want. Applying pressure will only push her away. You both need to work together at all times. You’re a team now!
Don’t stop communicating with her. Express your feelings and add your input whenever it’s needed.
We have male mentors available to talk with you who can understand your situation from a man’s point of view. Please call 864.582.4673 to connect with a mentor.